21 Guns

I think these few lines of the song are particularly meaningful.

Do you know what's worth fighting for ?

When it's not worth dying for?

......

Does the pain weigh out the pride ?

It's been awhile since I've written, partly because I've not been bitten by the writing bug, but mostly just because I don't feel I have anything worthwhile to say.

I'm in a mopey mood tonight.

Just one of those down-in-the-dumps kinda moods.

I attended the wedding of a family friend's daughter the day before, and her father wrote her such a lovely speech.

She has done so much to make him proud; going to Oxford and then Harvard for her MBA, securing a great job, and now meeting a great guy who comes from a similarly pedigreed background.

It was a long speech, and pride was literally oozing from every word he spoke.

It made me think.

I thought real hard and I couldn't think of a single thing I have done that would have brought such pride to my parents. I have always been just mediocre, neither academically gifted, nor exceptionally talented in any way. And now, on a mediocre (or perhaps less than) career path.

And despite my mediocrity, tonight I'm feeling so tired from it all.

Isn't that funny ? I haven't done exceptionally well in any aspect of my life, and yet I'm tired.

What from ?